So .. Tonight while paying bills online and searching for a beachfront vacation for Nick and I to take after graduation (That's right, WE'VE EARNED ONE!!) I started looking around in computer folders and came across the pictures from our childhood that Nick and I used for our wedding video. I didn't think I'd ever posted them on here! And even if I did they are definitely cute enough to post again :) Here's baby Nick and baby Sadey:
This cute girl turned FOUR last week and I can't even believe it! She is the prettiest sweetest thing I know. I love how much she loves me. She always brags to everyone that I'm her birthmom because she was in my belly. Yep! You sure were missy! And I am the luckiest. I'm so thankful for the huge blessing she and her family is in my life. At the time it was the hardest, most emotionally draining, and trying thing I've vet had to go through. I remember just crying on my knees asking my Heavenly Father to PLEASE give me enough strength to make this decision and go through this alone. He did, of course, and here I am 4 years later with a life better than I could have even imagined. I have the best husband, married in the temple, I'm 6 weeks away from graduating, and I still get to have a relationship with little miss. How amazing is that? Life is good.
The pictures of Malia in the yellow dress is from my visit to her on her actual birthday and the rest are pictures from her birthday party today.
Today was a sleep catch up day after I got home from work this morning which means I didn't get out I bed till 430. Felt SO nice. For having zero plans tonight turned into a pretty good one! My parents called us to see if we wanted to go on a double date with em. Hello!? Of course we did! We indulged in some red meat, seafood, and ranch covered carbs. Yummo. Then it was time for Dad to take me on a motorcycle ride! We headed to my parents house but not without stopping off for a snowie of course. We spent the rest of the day talking on the from porch, motorcycling, and listening to Dad tell us about his close calls with the fuzz when he was a teenager. It was one of those perfect summer nights if you ask me.
Pictures:
-Taylor finally cut his hair!! He looks so handsome. He turns his missionary papers in within the next few weeks do it was time for him to break down and get rid of the mop and boy are we sure happy about it! Loving the new look!
-We brought Sabastian home the bones from Nick's steak and he went crazy in it! I even gave him a few bites of my snowie. Spoiled dog.
-The views from our motorcycle ride. There are some huge fires here in Utah so the skies are filled with smoke. Funny how some of the prettiest sunsets here are thanks to forest fires around here. Weird.
-The 'G'. As in PG. As in seeing this on the mountains means Im home sweet home.
-Cereal and doodling. Thats what happens at work at 345am sometimes.
-strawberry days carnival
-Nick taking a nap. I am such an ugly sleeper and he seems to always want to take pictures to document my beauty rest. Took one of him this time :)
Disclaimer: Now that I have accomplished my goal of posting often I've decided that it's time to up the blogging ante. This also has to do with the reason I put my blog as private. Lately I've been posting pictures and a timeline of Nick and I's busy lives but I haven't been focusing on the biggest part of why I started this blog. I wanted to use this blog as a journal of sorts. I print it off every year to have a little glimpse of my life in a book. So, now that this blog is private and I don't have a bunch of weirdies I don't know from Russia reading this (seriously, blogger showed someone in Russia was reading my blog ... creepy) I will now write freely. I guess my disclaimer is this: my blog is not going to be all rainbows and butterflies all the time because life just isn't that way sometimes. If you find that whiny, I wouldn't read this all the time. If you find people talking about how wonderful life is and how hard it can be too as a breath of fresh air, then read on my friends.
Lets just start this out with what's on my mind as of late:
First of all, how awesome is Strawberry Days people! I was born in and raised in Pleasant Grove my entire life until I had to put my big girl panties on and move out of the house at the ripe old age of 18. No matter where I've lived since then I've never felt attached to anywhere. I've never felt like hey, this is home for now. I've always felt like a visitor in an apartment that I'd love to move out of a month after I move in. Every time I go to my parents house I just feel like I'm home. The smells, the yard, the family, the everything. When we visit their ward I get hugs from people who have been just like family ever since I can remember. You're probably wondering how all of this nostalgia ties in with Strawberry Days. Well, every Thursday during the week of Strawberry Days is the Chipman's Block Party. They block off part of the street in our neighborhood and throw a party. There is a D.J. at one end and food tables filled with sloppy joes, hot dogs, and just about every type of salad and dessert you can imagine. When I was younger I remember LIVING for that day of the year. My friends and I would get all dolled up cause hello, everyone was going to be there! Not to mention those cute boys we would get to slow dance with! :) This year I found myself just as excited for very different reasons. I was excited to see all those people that have always meant so much to me and get a million hugs from them. I was excited to sit out in the sunshine in the neighborhood that I have so many memories in. I was excited to have Nick meet more people from my life that I knew he'd love just as much as I do. I didn't know my favorite part would be catching up with a childhood friend for hours. Ashlyn and I not only shared bottles when we were babies but we shared markers in kindergarten, clothes in junior high, and the love of softball in high school. As high school went on and we moved out and on with our lives and grew apart but it was so fun to talk and see that we still get along just like we used to. She's now in Vegas with her husband in pre-law school and Nick and I are here not knowing where the next chapter of our lives is going to take us. One thing that definitely needs to happen from here is a reunion more than once every few years. I'm so grateful for the memories and roots that my parent gave me. Whenever life gets overwhelming and wonder what the heck I'm doing wrong all I need to do is take the trip to Cherokee Drive and sit on the front porch swing. It's amazing how much my mind clears and how much better I feel when I leave that place and head out in the world to get beat up a little more.
The next thing filling my mind? The next chapter. There is so much up in the air right now that I don't even know what to do with myself. For those of you who know me you probably know how much of a planner I am. I've never been much of a 'spur of the moment' kind of gal. Nick and I are at a crossroads. We both finish school the last week of July. After that the plan is for Nick to head off to boot camp for 8 weeks and then to tech school (Air Force training school) for another couple of months. That is pretty much set in stone. It's what I'll be doing that's up in the air. With so many nurses in Utah will I even be able to get a job right now having no experience as an RN? Should I move to where Nick will be for a few months and get a job there? What about a baby? Clearly I'm dying for one so why can't Nick feel the same way? Is it intuition or emotions that are making me feel the way I do? Why is Nick so stubborn? Is it just me being stubborn? What about a house? We need to buy a house before this market goes back up. Can we afford both right away? I'd rather have a baby than a new house. But we need a house. Why am I thinking about all of this right now? Shouldn't I be thinking about where I can fit sleep in this week rather than the entire future of our family? Are you completely exhausted from reading this yet? I'm sure exhausted from thinking all of these questions and more twenty-four-freaking-seven. Seriously. I wonder why I'm such a scatterbrained, moody, and anxiety ridden gal with a face that won't stop breaking out lately.
You are probably thinking 'Somebody call a psychologist cause Mrs. Chadwick is heading for a nervous breakdown on a high speed train!' but don't worry friends. I really am okay. A little stressed, yes. But no matter how stressed I am it helps to remember that I am infinitely blessed compared to whatever it is I'm struggling with. Here are just a few:
-I have the greatest husband in the whole wide world. Be jealous. We might not see eye to eye on the baby thing lately but as hard as that is I know how much he loves me and that he'd do anything to make me happy. I don't think there is another man in the whole wide world who could put up with me but he does and I thank God every day for that.
-Not only do I have the greatest husband in the world but I have the greatest family. You can be jealous of that too. The quote 'We may not have it all together but together we have it all' describes our family completely. They are my best friends besides my hubby. I talk to my Dad almost every day and look up to him for everything. My mom always brings us together on Sundays with the greatest home cooked meals ever. I've never met anyone who can cook like her. Taylor keeps us laughing with his quick wit and sense of humor. Then there is Savannah, the sweetest most tender hearted girl I know. I know I've said it before but I love the relationship we have. There is just over 6 years between the two of us but you'd never know it. We are such good friends. She loves to sleep over here, paint nails, stay up late, laugh too hard, and confide in me. It makes me SO happy to have the relationship we have with my family and I pray that that never changes.
-I'm done with school in 6 weeks. Yes you heard me right people, SIX WEEKS! That is something to celebrate.
-I work with the best girls around. I sometimes dread work because of the sleep I know I'll be missing by working through the night but the second I get there I know it'll be a good night. Those crazy co-workers of mine are some of my greatest friends and probably know more about me then a lot of people do and love me through my craziness, and heaven knows I sure love them because of theirs!
-Besides working with those lovely ladies my job is the best too! Holding those newborns and taking care of brand new Mommas is the best job I could have asked for.
-I have the prettiest little girl with the best family in the world. Beth is such an example to me and the type of mom I want to be someday. I couldn't have asked for a better daddy for my little lady or hand picked better brothers for her. Little miss sure is a diva but such a sweetheart when she wants to be. I can't imagine where I would be without her in my life. I owe so much to her and she's not old enough to even know it. I wouldn't have the drive, motivation, focus, and purpose behind what I'm working for and the decisions I've made since I was blessed enough to have her in my life.
Clearly the big guy upstairs has been looking out for me in more ways than I can count. I need to make more time out of my days to remember that to keep that anxiety of the unknown I feel lately at bay. It's not my timetable that's the right one.
Sure love spending time with the Chadwick's! We went up to Heber to have a BBQ with Nick's dad, sisters, niece, nephew, dad's girlfriend, and a few of her kids. I had so much fun spending time with them all eating, talking, playing catch, and going for a drive in a new F-150 Eco boost. Life is good. I sure love my other family! And can I just say how baby hungry Ayden and Avery make me!? Those kids have SO much personality and are a blast to be around. I think we need to give those 2 a cousin!! (cough*Nick*cough)
Speaking of babies ... Tomorrow I get my Mirena out! Not to start trying to have babies right now (even though I wish wish wish we were) but to see if taking that out will decrease the pelvic pain I've got going on. Here's hoping!
And yes, as a matter of fact I DID paint my nails twice today! I wasn't feeling the red and blue so I went for the Zebra stripes. Never lets me down haha
I have the best Dad I could have ever asked for. With everything I've gone through and the hard times I've had he's always been there right beside me supporting me and cheering me on. He's the most gentle, compassionate, and generous man I've ever known. Thanks for always being my rock, example, counselor, prankster, motorcycle chauffeur, and friend. You are truly the greatest.
Today we went to Tibble Fork as a family and roasted hot dogs and mallows and walked by the little lake. After that we went back to Pleasant Grove. Dad took me on a motorcycle ride. (For those of you who don't know I am a little bit of a thrill seeker when it comes to any sort of motorized vehicle including but not limited to: motorcycles, ATVs, boats ... I love it all!) After the motorcycle ride I took Savannah out driving which was a blast! I love that little lady so so much. I love that we aren't just siblings but we are best buddies. Family is the greatest.
I've been a workin woman the last couple days. Last night had to have been the longest shift of all time. I was in the nursery and we didn't admit one single baby all night long! I didn't have much work to do but I sure did get a bunch of homework done! I finished a paper, worked on our windshield survey for my group project, and even took 4 online quizzes. Go me. I feel MUCH less stressed so the slow shift was definitely a good thing after all.
Apart from sleeping I've taken a few quick snapshots.
-bored at work
-crafting and eating at work
-organized the bathroom
-baked oatmeal white chocolate chip cookies for my co workers
I can't wait to wake up this afternoon and spend Fathers Day with my sweet dad and family up in the mountains. Pictures to come I'm sure!
Today I started applying or RN positions. Crazy!! I love it! I doubt I'll get hired till August but it doesn't hurt to start trying right now!
Another great thing about today? I got put on call. Wish it'd happened tomorrow so i could at least get in some capstone hours while Im called off but hey, I'll take it!
The last great thing about today? Spending the evening with my handsome man (even with a gross mustache) making dinner, watching the NBA finals, talking, and laughing so hard I cried. I am the luckiest.
Difficult times have helped me to understand better than before, how infinitely rich and beautiful life is in every way, and that so many things that one goes worrying about are of no importance whatsoever.
-Isac Dinesen
In 36 hours I have ...
Finished some homework
Put in another 12 hours in towards my capstone
Went to school
Got a snowie
Admired flowers in our yard
Met with my visiting teachers
Went to Costco
Got pictures back from a backyard party with friends
Passed 2 tests with an 82% and 84%
Painted my nails
Took a pregnancy test (boo.)
Not slept
And with that, I have two words for you ... GOOD. NIGHT!
